The Hand-On-Heart Technique For Love and Connection
Take a nice deep breath into your belly, and place your hand on your heart. What do you feel?
For me, I feel a sense of warmth and connection, almost like someone came up from behind me and draped a soft blanket over my shoulders. For you, it may be a sense of safety, relaxation, and calm, or you may just feel silly wondering why you’re putting your hand on your heart.
When you can get out of your head and into your body, human touch (even your own) can be incredibly healing, and this is something that the Vedic scholars understood deeply.
Why does it feel so good to be touched?
Within the layers of your skin lies a vast network of nerve endings and touch receptors, making it possible for you to sense physical inputs from the outside world. This network, referred to as your somatosensory system, allows you to feel sensations such as heat, cold, pain, pleasure, pressure, vibration, smoothness, roughness, and so on.
When you touch something or feel a sensation, it stimulates the touch receptors in your skin, sending a signal to the nearest nerve ending. Your nerve endings then send a signal through your nervous system up to your brain, and you register the signal as a sensation.
When that sensation is pleasant, such as hugging, massage, sexual intercourse, and even placing your own hand on your heart, it increases levels of the “love” hormone oxytocin via signals from the somatosensory system[*].
Oxytocin dials down your sympathetic nervous system (which is responsible for the fight or flight response) and dials up the parasympathetic nervous system, allowing you to feel calm and safe[*].
When oxytocin is flowing, it creates feelings of love, safety, and connection and enhances your ability to express emotions and engage socially.
This is precisely why physical touch isn’t just a “nice to have” but is biologically wired into our systems as a necessity for survival. In fact, when an infant is born, physical touch from his or her parents is so vital that without it, the infant may develop a failure to thrive[*].
While there are many ways to leverage the power of touch in our lives, the simple hand-on-heart technique is a favorite for many people due to the concentration of nerve endings in this area of the body. Furthermore, this center in your body is the home of your heart chakra, the caretaker of your emotional world, and the center that connects you to humanity as a whole.
By bringing focus and attention to your heart, you tap into a network of energy much larger than you, allowing you to feel held and safe in a generally chaotic and unpredictable world.
A Simple Hand-On-Heart Practice
Place your hand on your heart (whichever hand feels right, or you can do both).
Take a deep breath into your belly, and breathe out.
Now just sit with your hand on your heart, and notice the sensations that arise. Try to stay with the sensations without analyzing or allowing your mind to take over. The more you stay in the realm of sensation, the more power you give to your heart.
You can continue for as long as you like, but even just a few seconds can create a shift.
Every time you practice this technique, you may find that different sensations arise. Personally, I’ve noticed that the more I practice placing my hand on my heart, the faster and more profoundly I feel a sense of calm and safety.
What makes this practice particularly helpful is that you can do it anytime, anywhere. Driving in your car, in a meeting, at dinner, in a coffee shop… you get it.
So, the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, worried, stressed, or generally out of balance, try placing a hand on your heart to allow for a quick shift in your nervous system.